This article from Inspiration and Chai talks about a palliative care nurse who was constantly in touch with people that were about to die.
She was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives, and saw how they experienced differente emotions as denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually, acceptance.
When they were asked about their regrets or what things they would have done differently, common themes were repeated again and again:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common one. When people realize their life is almost over and look back on it, it’s easy to see many unfulfilled dreams .
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
This was said by every male patient. Once you are following “the rat race”, you have to work more and more, while leaving apart your youth, the company of your partner, your life…
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppress their feelings to avoid problems with others. As a result, they become full of hate and resentment that just embitter your existence.
We cannot control the reactions of others, although people may initially react badly if you speak honestly, in the end the relationship become much healthier. And if they don’t accept it, bye relation. Either way, you win.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Everybody miss their friends when dying. Money does not matter, in the end is just your friends, your family, your partner…
It is very common today to focus on your career and leave your friends away, being in contact just with people in the office or some neighbour without going deep. For when you want to realize, you cannot find them or nothing is as it was before.
5. I wish I had let myself be happier.
Many of them don’t realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They’re immersed in the routine, afraid to get out of the “ normal” and imitating what people around them do. When what they really want to do is to try new things, to be surprised again, to jump up out of the bed in the morning looking forward to a new day not knowing what will happen, to know someone special…
And that’s all the article. It has made me think about what I would regret if I knew I was going to die soon. I think my regret would be to not have lived all my life as I have been living it the last 5/6 months, especially for not following my instincts and not having the courage to make some decisions.
I hope you have enjoyed it and helped you to see what really matters in life. I thought it would be perfect to post it now that I am starting to write on this blog because they share the same philosophy:
Don’t waste your life working, fulfill your dreams, be as you are not as you are expected to be, surround yourself with people who love you…
In short, be happy
This post was written more than 6 months ago, maybe things have changed or I don't think the same way anymore